Sunday, February 19, 2012

Uncomfortable with Vets

I know it has been a long time since the last post, but I took some much needed time off work after the deployment and am now getting back into the swing of things. Work has returned with a vengeance, but is starting to settle down a bit and I hope to post at least every other week.

One thing I was asked to do at the end of last month was to speak to my Presbytery (they are the governing body of me as a minister) about what I do as a chaplain, how a chaplain ministers in combat and how churches can help out chaplains. I think this blog has covered the first two items over the last few months, mostly in order to provide a glimpse of life in Afghanistan to the families of 1/9, but I haven't really talked about the last item. Reflecting on the topic before the talk, I realized that chaplains really need to take the lead in speaking out on how to care for our service members who are deployed, combat or not. We have a unique inside angle on the spiritual needs of service members and sometimes we allow ourselves to stay fairly isolated from the larger faith community to which we belong. I realized that at times I also fall into this category and have forced myself to keep that from happening.

There is a distinct divide between those who serve and those who don't. I don't hold myself in greater esteem because I serve a unique congregation, but I think faith communities would do a better job supporting chaplains and their "flock" if they knew what we did and if we actually told them what support we needed. Sure, I could just rely on the military programs for helping my Marines and sailors, but I honestly believe that faith communities (regardless of their theology or beliefs) need to take a larger role in caring for those who have served.

Most congregations I have attended during my years on active duty talk about serving the military. But, they do so through care packages and prayer. I'm not discounting the need for these things. Personally, I am convinced the prayers of many people across the country played a role in my entire battalion making it home alive and with all their limbs. We had many close calls that I could never explain why those guys are still here with me today except through some divine plan I don't understand and probably never will. And care packages are vital for morale as they serve as tangible evidence they are not forgotten. Opening those boxes brings many smiles thousands of miles away. I would just ask churches to contact the receiving unit before sending something. When you send without knowing the needs, some stuff may end up in the burn pit.

In reflecting on the idea of what churches can do for those who serve in the military (and this would probably hold true for other groups who avoid church) is to allow themselves to feel uncomfortable. Uncomfortable sitting beside someone who may have killed in combat. Combat those in the congregation send into combat by the way. A congregation who is willing to sit with and come alongside that individual as they work out what they saw and did in combat. A congregation willing to enter into the murky and uncomfortable world of ethics in combat, what some have called "ethical warriors" or "noble warriors." A congregation that will listen in love and not judge them because they are in the military. Some may come seeking repentance for what they have seen and done. Some may say they have done nothing wrong. Both of them should be welcomed with open arms into our congregations. We say no sin is too large for God, we need to live that out. These conversations are messy, painful, uncomfortable, unruly. But they are beautiful, healing, at times joyful. I know as I have them on a regular basis and many of those conversations don't deal with combat related issues. I encounter more service members damaged from other aspects of society than their deployment to Afghanistan. Even an atheist in my battalion recognizes the need for somewhere for his young Marines to have these conversations.

Without a healthy and supportive environment to work through this discomfort, my Marines and sailors will seek unhealthy ways to navigate the issues. Chaplains are only in their lives for a short amount of time. I have only been in 1/9 for 16 months and almost half of them will be in other units by April. Churches, synagogues, mosques, etc can offer a stable long-term presence in the lives of my service members. Especially if a denomination embraces this call and no matter where they are stationed they can turn to a specific faith group for a loving community to be there if they are needed. If you are reading this and a member of a faith community I challenge you to go beyond prayer and care packages and invite your vets to discuss what needs they have.

I am more than willing to discuss this with anyone who wants to explore ways to provide such a community, regardless of your faith preference. Just drop me a line or discuss freely in the comments.